How I met Olga - the truth about Date sites

See it goes like this


I recently joined up to Twitter and within 24 hours I get this message from some random gorgeous girl telling me that there are hundreds of gorgeous women just like her waiting to meet a guy like me right now - I just have to subscribe to her match making date site.


Same with my new Facebook account - another equally gorgeous girl comes along promising me that hundreds just like her are waiting for a guy just like me.


I can hardly wait!


Like I appreciate that I am an attractive guy and all - but it's not about me. I mean, if I subscribe to one of these sites, being the good consumer and all, I'd expect to get me one of those hundreds of gorgeous women just like the one in the picture. Crikey, I should get her, she's the one that got me, and thousands like me, to sign up to the site in the first place.


But let's get real here... I'm not going to meet her or any of her gorgeous friends, I'm actually going to meet up with Olga the old fishwife or one of thousands of dowdy depressed middle-aged women just like her who actually do subscribe to these sites (there's no genuinely gorgeous women here and any guy who thought there would be needs a brain scan).


But I can't be too harsh about Olga the old fishwife. She's been sucked in too. She, along with her dowdy companions, were probably promised by Beefcake Jim with the six-pack and biceps that he and hundreds like him were just waiting on the edge of their seats to meet someone like her. So she paid over her subscription only to find that most of the guys waiting at the other end of the fibre-optic had nicknames like Horse or Boweavil, lived in rustic country cottages with their Ma and Pa, and weren't exactly honest about what they meant when they said they came from a 'close family' (so, how does that explain the sixth toe there Horse?).


So as much as I'm annoyed that Olga the old fishwife doesn't stack up to the supposed hundreds of gorgeous women that I was promised, I can't really take it out on her. After all, she's kind of in the same boat - misled by Beefcake Jim only to find herself being invited to banjo playing jamborees and corn spitting festivals.


So the reality is, as much as I recognise that these sites are out to mislead me about who I might find there, Olga feels misled too. In this sense, we're both kind of the same.


Maybe I should go back in and check her profile again...


That's what I think... And usually I'm right.